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Sunday, February 12, 2006

I'm feeling sad. Yesterday I realised how out of touch I've been with the people I love most. It really sucks. It's like I've lost everything that meant to much to me and whatever is left is merely skin deep. I hear them talk about things and they all know everything about each other and when I hear it it's like new. So I feel like I shouldn't make any comment. UGH. I feel so guilty. These people have been my close friends, even my best, for so long and yet I feel like I hardly know anything about them anymore.

I'm selfish.

I haven't made a point to keep up with these people and it's my fault. :(

I'm glad for yesterday. It made me realise how much I miss everyone. Especially one person in particular. I'm going to do something about that.

Ugh I feel so upset. I miss everyone so much but it's like.. I don't know I feel empty.

I hate this.

I fall on my knees and I try to pray. In the silence I can hear Him say, "The river runs and the river hides, out to the ocean and under the sky. I promise you the answer will come, hold on to patience and watch for the sign. Everything in it's time.."

God, grant me peace and strength and perserverance.

3:16 PM